Denial and Addiction

Its been almost a year since I've posted anything. There has been a reason for that. And the reason isint that I've been soo busy working out. In the past year I could probably count how many times I've showed my face in a gym and know that I could not count how many food binges I have had. It pretty much started two posts ago or about a year, whichever you prefer. The past year has been a very trying year for me because I battle with Food Addiction. Yes, as silly as it sounds-it is real.

Food Addiction:

Experiments in animals and humans show that, for some people, the same reward and pleasure centers of the brain that are triggered by addictive drugs like cocaine and heroin are also activated by food, especially highly palatable foods. Highly palatable foods are foods rich in:

• Sugar
• Fat
• Salt

Like addictive drugs, highly palatable foods trigger feel-good brain chemicals such as dopamine. Once people experience pleasure associated with increased dopamine transmission in the brain's reward pathway from eating certain foods, they quickly feel the need to eat again.

The reward signals from highly palatable foods may override other signals of fullness and satisfaction. As a result, people keep eating, even when they're not hungry.

-Web MD

The Addiction is very scary. I worked so hard to lose over 100 lbs and to let it be ruined. I ruined myself. But because of food addiction no matter how much I hate myself after eating or how fat I feel. I still binge. I binge on almost everything. Good food and bad. When I have it in my head that I want a certain food. There really is no stopping me. I've canceled plans because of food. I've lost friends because of the addiction. I knew there house would be a trigger for me so I'd avoid going there, but being too embarrassed to talk to the friend about the addiction. Or would find an excuse to not hang out with someone because I'm embarrassed of how much weight I've gained. I stopped going to places such as bible study/church because I'm embarrassed of my weight. But yet, none of those things are enough to get me through it. 

Last night I was talking with a friend who also battles with food addiction. Its weird when we talk because its as if we are the same person. For the past year I have avoided the scale because I was scared of how much I gained. Nothing fits me except for workout pants and t shirts so I KNOW I've gained. It wasn't a secret, but something about getting on a scale scared me to death. My friend told me I had to eventually do it and face reality. She was right. I needed a reality check no matter how scared I was. So, I pulled out the scale and well-stepped on it. 

I didn't cry instantly-it took a few minutes for it to sink in. I'm not sure if I want to say my weight. I'm under 300 (338 being my heaviest), I've gained more than 80 lbs through 1 year. I seriously cried for about 20 minutes while I had 2 friends through text trying to encourage me. 

I know I need to change my eating habits, how? I'm not exactly sure, but if I dont I'm literally going to ruin my body and I'm not just talking about outside appearance. I'm scared as hell to re-start this journey especially now that I know addiction is involved. I always sort of knew I had a problem, but not that I REALLY know its scary. I'm scared, very scared. 

I have a good support system and am starting a new book on how to fight food addiction. With that I'm hoping I can finally beat my addiction. 

New Year

Its that time of year. The gyms are packed with ambitious goal driven people. This is also known as the "New Year Resolution Season" during January and February normally dying out through March.

 

My challenge for YOU-keep pushing. Working out and losing weight is a blast at first for most-but you can keep it fun. MIX IT UP. If you are one of those New Year Resolution people-my challenge for you is to prove to yourself you have it in you to stay committed. Working out just isn't about losing weight its about being healthy and that is the bigger picture. It is far too easy to give up and you get no satisfaction from it. We all fall and all stumble and that's OK as long as we get back up and take a lesson learned from the fall. The key is to be able to learn something and strengthen yourself from both the good and the bad.

 

So keep your New Year Resolution and turn it into an ALL Year Resolution! It doesn't just take a season to make a New You.

 

New Year-New You!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

vegurski@yahoo.com

Fall

I've been debating heavily on whether or not I wanted to post this. But I promised myself and you that if I was going to start this blog, I wasn't going to hold back-so staying true to that-here I go...

It started Halloween Night-I had a few fun sized candies... No biggie...

Well, now its kind of a biggie seeing as 1 always leads to more and I'm not just referring to candy.

I have gained 7-10 lbs.

I'm not proud of this at all and quite disappointed in myself.

Halloween night I had some candy, some chips and brownies-told myself it was just that night (after all, it is Halloween!) Not soo much. The past month I have been making several of those "just one time" bites. And even occasionally found myself binging (not on good food). I was craving chips and salsa one night-not horrible right? Sure chips are carbs, but is this one night of chips and salsa going to make me fat? Not likely... So I go to Meijer and get chips and salsa. I somehow end up in the ice cream isle. I carefully pick out my "treat". A box of weight watchers mini (like 3 bite and its gone mini) ice cream sandwiches-8 in the box (which realistically is like 3 full size ones). Well not only do I eat most of the chips in the bag with salsa. I decide to binge on 6 of the 8 mini ice cream sandwiches. I HATED myself after leading myself to tears...

You'd think that would be enough to stop this from happening again right?



WRONG


The next day I had a craving for Pizza (Jets Pizza). I order it (a small pizza and small order of bread) and eat most of it and again-cry it out, beating myself up over it...

Then Thanksgiving comes-and I'm sure we allll know how that ends. I did tell myself that after Thanksgiving was gone-I was back to normal routine...

I cant understand why I'm doing this. I've worked sooo hard and wanting to lose more weight... Why am I self destructing again? This isn't me-this is the old Vit-the Vit I don't like or want to be...

There has been a lot going on this past month... I haven't been at the gym like I normally am because I've got a 2nd job, the Holidays are emotionally stressful, I found out I needed to move by the end of Nov. so that was stressful in itself. So with stress and lack of gym and everything in between I have a million excuses. But guess what? I can't use any of them because I've lost 136 and know the difference between whats good for me and whats bad. Does it suck that I've gained 7-10 pounds? Absolutely. I feel fat as heck and don't feel good about myself at all. But I have to take it as another learning experience through this whole journey. Let me tell you... They don't call it a journey for nothing!

Bottom line is-no one is perfect and more than likely if your trying to lose weight you will fall off track and may gain a few pounds. That sentence is not meant to be negative. But take those "falls" and turn them into a learning experience and come out of it even stronger :-)

Content?

When I was 338 pounds and the idea of weight loss was in my head. I was content with getting to around 260 pounds...

Content?

Not so much...

I am now 205 pounds! Yes! A few more pounds and I will officially be out of the 200's. I made it out of the 300's and am ALMOST out of the 200's. I'm soo excited and honestly-proud of myself for the 1st time.

Since I'm just me-living day to day losing a pound here and there I don't quite always comprehend that I've lost 133 pounds and just how much that really is. It takes people like you, like my friends to put me in reality and get me to see "Wow, 133 pounds is ALOT". I'm proud to say I did it without diet pills and without surgery. Just hard work, eating right and exercising. I have a story for every pound lost. I'm not done with my journey but when I am, I will be able to say "I DID IT". I can not and will never discredit some key people in my life who have been there with me through it all-support, laughs, tears, questions, teaching, learning, sharing and the list goes on. I've had some of the best support around and that can not be traded for anything.

I look back through the 133 pounds I've lost-not only have I shed the pounds, but I've gained sooo much personal growth. I truly can say I am in love with my life and have never been happier. :-)

                                          338 lbs                                                      205 lbs

Also-I fly out to Texas tonight for the Juice Plus+ Conference! If you haven't heard of Juice Plus+ by now-check it out! Cant wait to tell you all about the conference!

 www.getfitwithvitjuiceplus.com

www.facebook.com/getfitwithvit

 

 

vegurski@yahoo.com

Sugar and Spinach!

Its been such a long time!!! Life for me has been extremely busy lately. First off-I want to thank everyone for all the positive-ness. It really is overwhelming and truly is motivation! I'm still getting used to people asking me questions about Health and Nutrition and asking for my help in their journey. I can honestly say though-that one of my favorite things about the weight loss has been being able to help other people. One of my biggest passions in life is health and nutrition and feel like everyone needs to be educated on it!

Okay-That aside... Lets talk about Sugar! Sugar and I have an interesting relationship! (As I'm sure many others do as well!) I LOVE IT! Now, that being said-my only source of sugars come from mainly fruits. I've been really cutting down on the fruits. I still have my strawberries and blueberries in the morning for a snack but other than that I TRY NOT to really do any other fruits. The last 2 weeks I'd say-I've really cut back on the fruits and have been focusing mostly on veggies. I've been snacking on cucumbers, carrots, kale, and my fav-sugar snap peas (eating them right now!) I'm not saying fruit is bad and I'd much rather you chose fruit over breads/carbs. BUT it still contains sugars!

I've also been putting spinach in almost everything! Anywhere I can add spinach-I add it. My Turkey burgers are now green from the excessive amount of Spinach I put in them as well as my eggs. I scramble spinach into them as well! Anywhere I can throw in extra veggies-I'm allll in!

___________________________________________________________________________________



I've also become a distributor for a company called Juice Plus+. If you've never heard of it I highly suggest checking it out. Its a product I HIGHLY recommend. Its a capsule containing phytonutrients from 17 different fruits and veggies. Its ALL natural and whole food based!

www.getfitwithvitjuiceplus.com

I'm having a Juice Plus+ Party this Sunday at 4. Also Oct. 19th (Friday) around 5 or 5:30 if your interested in checking it out beyond the website! My Doctor will be there as well to answer any questions I can not. (Email me for directions and more info)

vegurski@yahoo.com

Along with the blog I have a facebook "page" www.facebook.com/getfitwithvit Please "LIKE" the page and share if you can!!!

Back in Business!!!!

Its been a while! My computer was in repair and I finally have it back!!! So stay tuned for regular posts again! I'm exhausted after my workout tonight. But just wanted to get a quick post in...

Saturday Oct. 6th at 1:30 I am having a Juice Plus/Wellness Party.

All are invited and friends are welcome!

Location:

Email me for directions

 

 

Check it out and if your interested in coming, let me know!!!
(email me at vegurski@gmail.com and I'll get you more information if needed!)

 

www.getfitwithvitjuiceplus.com

 

 

Current Weight: 213

Current Weight Loss: 125 LBS!

Excuses

I hurt my back (I'm A-Okay now!) and was not able to work out for a week. Back when I was in School I would to find ANY excuse to get out of gym class... And I mean ANY EXCUSE. I can honestly say, not being able to work out was depressing and sad but it made me realize how much I LOVE to work out. I feel great after every workout. It's like I've become addicted to it! Beats drugs right?! lol
I was sooo excited to be cleared to get back to working out. I MISSSSED it! Although being off for a week gave me some time to think...
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Working out allows me to prove myself wrong. I still quite frequently think of the days in the beginning of this weight loss journey where I was "No way in hell going to work out." I was SCARED to go to a gym being so big, SCARED to try new things being so big. Which may sound strange because I really did want to lose weight... Being sooo over weight made me uncomfortable in almost every area in my life. I'm glad I had people in my life to push me. People who believed in me-and honestly-people who didn't believe in me.

I wasn't completely comfortable at the gym once I finally got there. It took me a while. I still have my scared moments, not going to lie... But I have proven to myself that I can do ANYTHING. Every time I've said "I can't" and was pushed to do it anyway, I've been able to do it. May not have been easy, may have hurt like hell, may have felt like I was going to pass out, may have not done it again since trying it! lol But I DID it non the less.

I still have people who don't believe in me and doubt me and for a long time it felt great to prove them wrong, and still does. But nothing is better than proving myself to me. I have a whole new confidence level and respect for myself... and that to me is priceless. My main motivation at the gym is ME, the haters are just extra motivation ;-) There is nothing better than setting up a challenge for yourself (big or small) and accomplishing it!

I said all that to say. Stop finding excuses and just do something. If you honestly want it bad enough you'll stop the excuses. People ask for my help all the time but aren't willing to give up their favorite foods or to become active... Wishing and hoping does NOT work in the world of weight loss. If it was easy, everyone would be doing it. Prove to yourself that your stronger and better than you even know! I don't know one person who has ever regret working out or losing weight. Think about it :-)

PS-I've heard, said and used every excuse known to man... so if your gonna use an excuse on me... Save it :-)